So, womanhood. For me, today it means different thing than earlier.
When I was young, I think that my dad wanted a son.... He taught me how to handle a gun, how to shoot and how to fix metal frames in truck. He was truck driver. I actually sat in hes truck so many years... sometimes to just keeping him awake after being up and working 3 days at same eyes. Cool? Yep, work safety was in our heart....
Me at age less than year...-71.
I just loved to be dirty!
As I grew up, I felt like in that pic but had to be different by look. I started to pay attention to me. Well, during 80´s that was easy. Hair blonde and as up as you can put. Broken jeans and good to go.
Dont laugh... me as a teenager. :D Well, go ahead..laugh...that´s funny, I know. I´m in confessor camp here.
But during 90´s I had to be more. I had to be both man and woman. I had to be survivor. That was tough time for me. I did some modelling back then I looked like woman..but felt..well..tough.
Looked like a woman, but hard as a rock. I really had to be, my whole surviving was dependent on that...actually my life was.
Ok, forward! I travelled lot during those days, I went by myself to Bangladesh, India etc...priceless memories. And lessons! I saw so much and I have to say... I´m happy to be woman here in Finland. I dont need to go to barricades for my rights...I have all rights that I want. As a woman. What I saw back there... you know, can be harder.
Now? I´m at home. I found my place in this world and I have family again.
For me, that thing...I can be softer... I can pamper myself and be interesting about fashion and make ups again.... that´s for me is my freedom. I dont need to be tough, I can choose. I can say to my man: help. I can´t do this or that. I feel bad. My hormones makes me crazy. I want this new sofa. You know, be softer.
In these days that´s my power. Inside there will be always that girl from first picture, who just wants to get dirty and play. But woman has arrived too.... I want to pamper more. I want to be silly.
And by that I DONT mean, that it is what woman has to do or being woman is. No...we are strong and can do what ever we want.
But for me.... that´s a new thing. That´s a luxury that could not afforded to be since I was a kid. I just had to be too strong. Now I can let go and enjoy the ride.
Be your kind of woman, then you will be happier...Forget the rest.